Childhood is like being drunk, everyone remembers what you did, except you.
I always take life with a grain of salt, ...plus a slice of lemon, ...and a shot of tequila
My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him!
I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbor said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.'
