Concerning the absence of toilet paper, there should be complaint books laid out at publicly used places
Even if you were eaten, there will still be a two way out.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong