I downloaded the Pinterest app and now my phone is stuck in a mason jar.
There is a new trend in our office; everyone is putting names on their food. I saw it today, while I was eating a sandwich named Kevin.
I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbor said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.'
My calling in life went straight to voicemail.
