I took a course in speed waiting. Now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes.
Mom: If a boy touches your boobs say "don't" and if he touches your pussy say "stop"? Girl: But mom, he touched both so I said "don't stop".
The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead
Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.
