If I get interviewed by a police sketch artists, my only goal will be to see how far I get before he realizes I'm making him draw a pirate.
Why are women like KFC? After you've finished with the thigh and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.
Programming is like sex; one mistake and you have to support for a lifetime.
Why didn't the man report his stolen credit card? The thief was spending less then his wife