My dream woman has a special combination of inner and outer beauty and is, most importantly, too naive to know she's way out of my league.
I love my FedEx guy cause he's a drug dealer and he doesn't even know it, and he's always on time
What is the difference between a clever midget and a venereal disease? One is a cunning runt, and the other is a running c*nt
A real Don Juan has to dress not only tasteful but also very quickly.