Sex is a misdemeanor; the more I miss, the meaner I get!
What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on Valentine's Day? You're purrr-fect for me!
What happened when the man fell in love with his garden? It made him wed his plants!
A man enters a store and says: "15 litres of wine please." "Did you bring a container for this?" "You're speaking to it."
