What do you call a Mexican with a vasectomy? A dry Martinez.
Slept like a log last night... Woke up in the fireplace.
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong
What's the difference between a tire and 365 used rubbers? One is a Goodyear and the other is a great year
