I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months- I don't like to interrupt her.
My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy... so I got drunk
If you feel lonely, down, forgotten, or just need someone to cheer you up. Remember, you can always change your birthday on Facebook!
What's the difference between love, true love and showing off? Spitting, swallowing, and gargling
