I worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
Behind every fat woman there is a beautiful woman. No seriously, you are in the way
I rather go to hell than Heaven. I don't know how mermaids in heaven can seduce me when they don't have legs to spread.
How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work
