Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.
Why does it take 100 million sperms to fertilize one egg? Because they won't stop to ask directions
[man] Excuse me, would you like to dance? [women] NO! [man] Maybe u didn't hear me. I said u look really fat in those pants!
You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.
