You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women? When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there
I sometimes watch birds and wonder "If I could fly who would I shit on?"
How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work