Not everyone can move to a mountain, some are married to one
A woman comes into the mall today, so huge she's protected by Greenpeace and asks for a size 4 shoe. So I asked her if she wants to eat them there or takes them home
Only way I know it's spring is when the snow melts and I see my garbage on Marcy's lawn
Why don't you follow me down the brewery, I'll tie a bowling ball to my ankle, dive in a vat of beer, I'll leave this world the same way I entered my marriage. Dead Drunk!
