I had to give a driving test to a woman who is so fat they had to shoot her license photo with the Hubble telescope
We've been married for 17 years now, can't we just be friends?
Don't put on a dress and ask us if it makes you look fat. We hate that. Besides, it's not the dress that makes you look fat, it's the fat that makes you look fat
So I'm trying to force a pair of size 13 shoes on her Jurassic feet