My kids may not be angels, but when they screw up, I don't blame TV. I put the blame squarely where it belongs, on their mother
Oh, Lord, if I ever meant anything to you, please let me fall asleep before she thinks of sex
Only way I know it's spring is when the snow melts and I see my garbage on Marcy's lawn
"Kelly": We've never had a father-daughter talk. "Al": That's because up until now, I've never had anything to say to you.