Latest Funny One Liners

Don't piss me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

Sex is like air; its not important unless you arent getting any.

I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? Snowballs.

Just because you have one doesn't mean you have to act like one.

Being a hypochondriac is going to save my life one of these days