Latest Funny One Liners

You haven't experienced awkward until you try to tickle someone who isn't ticklish

I always knew that I could never be a lawyer because of my inability to pass a bar

It is said that, you can't buy happiness. You only need to know the right places

In democracy, it's your vote that counts. In feudalism, it's your count that votes

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing

Hey, I'm not saying Hitler was a great guy, but he really saved the History channel

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target