Latest Married With Children One Liners & Quotes

Al Bundy

Unlike marriage, phone sex is a victim-less crime

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3.11 from: 9 votes

Divorce our wives and move to Saudi Arabia so we can both marry Crystal

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3.6 from: 10 votes

Only way I know it's spring is when the snow melts and I see my garbage on Marcy's lawn

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3 from: 14 votes

Guys, I'm just happy for both of you. What say we celebrate by you getting the hell our of here, and me watching my TV!

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3.57 from: 7 votes

Friends, don't have them, don't need them, sure as hell don't wanna watch them

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 3.67 from: 12 votes

There's only one kind of kiss, man faces his woman, closes his eyes, imagines he's with someone else, just like sex

This Al Bundy quote is rated: 1 from: 4 votes

Unlike your bra, there's a catch

This Bud Bundy quote is rated: 2.63 from: 16 votes