Latest Funny One Liners

What does NAACP stand for? National Association of Apes Called People.

The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.

Your family tree must be a cactus because everybody on it is a prick.

Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? Ask your mother.

If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Loneliness is when a person always knows where all of his things are.