Funny One Liners

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.

It's better to be the first lover than a third wife.

Early to bed, early to rise makes people suspicious.

As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?

After (M)onday and (T)uesday even the week says WTF!

I may love to shop but I'm not buying your bullshit.

Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Cindrella?