Latest Funny One Liners

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in the way that they are looking forward to it

Sometimes we expect more from others because we would be willing to do that much more for them

No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves

I think the only time my ex didn't fake an orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers

I bought a new Japanese car. I turned on the radio... I don't understand a word they're saying

There are two kinds of people who don't say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot

If you think for a second that I'm being serious, you're a guaranteed golden medal in the Special Olympics