Funny One Liners

Do I know you? Cause you look a lot like my next girlfriend.

Time may be a great healer but it's also a lousy beautician.

Do you wanna lose ten pounds of ugly fat? Cut off your head.

A book just fell on my head. I've only got myshelf to blame.

Why did the duck go to rehab? Because he was a quack addict!

The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.

Being an ugly girl is like being a man......you have to work