Funny One Liners

Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

A liberal is just a conservative that hasn't been mugged yet.

I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

It's funny how one person can make you never trust anybody...

Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.

Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?