Latest Al Bundy One Liners & Quotes

My kids may not be angels, but when they screw up, I don't blame TV. I put the blame squarely where it belongs, on their mother

Peg what is it with you? You can change six D batteries in the dark, but you can't find a 2 ton automobile in broad daylight

Much like a roid, they come back with a vengeance

Toothpaste is for people who kiss, smile and eat

Why don't you follow me down the brewery, I'll tie a bowling ball to my ankle, dive in a vat of beer, I'll leave this world the same way I entered my marriage. Dead Drunk!

Do I look like a happy man?

Peg, I'm not wasting my money like I wasted my youth.. On you