Latest Funny One Liners

How do you make a blonde's eyes light up? Shine a flashlight in their ear.

The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.

Dating a single mother is like continuing from somebody else's saved game.

What are the three words women hate to hear during sex? "Honey, I'm home!"

Do you want to speak to the manager or someone who know's what's going on?

If the speed of light is 186,000 miles/sec., what's the speed of darkness?

Why did God create the orgasm? So women can moan even when they're happy.