Latest Funny One Liners

Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account.

By the time you learn the rules of life, you're too old to play the game.

Wouldn't exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them?

Money isn't everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception

Did you hear about the Italian chef with a terminal illness? He pastaway.

What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning? Introduces themself.