Latest Funny One Liners

My "it's cold outside" post just went viral on Facebook.

What's the difference between purple and pink? The grip.

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.

Never go to bed angry, stay awake and plot your revenge.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!

Do it tomorrow. You have made enough mistakes for today.

What is a vampire's sweetheart called? His ghoul-friend.