Latest Funny One Liners

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some don't have film.

The truth is out there; it just hasn't been indexed well.

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

I am a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect.

Remember: You can eat your way out of almost any problem.