Funny One Liners

I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.

So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.

Why did God create alcohol? So ugly people would have a chance to have sex.

What is the thinnest book in the world? "What Men Know About Women"

At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he's adopted?

Why do we bake cookies and cook bacon?

Is forcing sex on a prostitute a rape or shoplifting?