All One Liners and Comebacks

One Liners

Scooters are for men who want to ride motorcycles, but prefer to feel the wind on their vaginas

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One Liners

I swear to drunk I'm not God, but seriously, stay in drugs, eat school, and don't do vegetables

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One Liners

Men live better than women. First of all, they get married later and secondly, they die earlier

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One Liners

No! for the last time stop asking if i am drunk. I am not drunk! Who would name their kid drunk?

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One Liners

If the other driver had stopped a few yards behind himself the accident would not have happened

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One Liners

The problem with being in the center of attention is that half of it is always behind your back

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One Liners

I have one of those unlimited cell phone plans. There's no limit to how much they can charge me

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