Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating? To stop the snoring before it starts
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Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in the way that they are looking forward to it
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Sometimes we expect more from others because we would be willing to do that much more for them
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No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves
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I think the only time my ex didn't fake an orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers
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I bought a new Japanese car. I turned on the radio... I don't understand a word they're saying
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There are two kinds of people who don't say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot
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