I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day long.
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Slept like a log last night... Woke up in the fireplace.
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Secret: Something which is told to one person at a time.
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I am on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.
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If you can't beat the record, you can beat up its owner.
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Why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey.
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You do realize makeup isn't going to fix your stupidity?
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