Latest Funny One Liners

You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.

Why are women like KFC? After you've finished with the thigh and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking? Because those men already have boyfriends.

Men don't realize that if we're sleeping with them on the first date, we're probably not interested in seeing them again either.

I hate girls that complain about being single every 3 minutes. 90% of my socks are single & you don't see them crying about it.

One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister." Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."

[man] Excuse me, would you like to dance? [women] NO! [man] Maybe u didn't hear me. I said u look really fat in those pants!