Funny One Liners

I'm allergic to hard work

Too many of your birthdays can kill you

I'm so much in debt, I think I should start a government.

A healthy relationship is a relationship based on a lie.

Dating a single mom is like continuing someone's else saved game.

Studies shows that people who have more birthdays live longer.

The difference between a hooker and a drug dealer is that a hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.