Funny One Liners

Did you get those yoga pants on sale? Because at my house they're 100% off,

What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can be.

I sometimes go to my own little world, but that's okay, they know me there.

When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start looking like nails.

I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

Why are men like blenders? You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

If tomatoes are technically a fruit, is ketchup technically a smoothie?