Funny One Liners

Why do they call it PMS? Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

Men read Playboy for the articles, women go to malls for the music.

"Why don't you trust me?", she texted both the guys simultaneously.

He can't decide whether to have his visor half open or half closed.

S.I.N.G.L.E...sexy! innocent! naughty! gorgeous! lustful! exciting!

If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ.

Beauty is only skin deep ...but ugly goes all the way to the bone!