You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
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The less you love a woman, the faster your hand gets tired.
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I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works.
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How are airplanes and women alike? They both have cockpits.
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Everyone can find one person or three cats waiting for him.
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You should argue with your wife only when she's not around.
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Last time I got caught stealing a calendar I got 12 months.
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