Latest Funny One Liners

Men are like Bluetooth. When they're close they're connected, when they move further they start looking for new equipment

If a woman falls, an idiot will walk by, a gentleman will help her to get up, but a real man will lie down with her

I don't think it's rude to ask someone in an online dating site to send a picture posing with a copy of today's newspaper

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day; give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish

When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've broke up, I think it's time you kept your promise!

I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect"

A man enters a store and says: "15 litres of wine please." "Did you bring a container for this?" "You're speaking to it."