Funny One Liners

You know you're ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back

I'm glad to see you're not letting your education get in the way of your ignorance

Don't be afraid to stand for what you believe in, even if that means standing alone

What do you have when you have two balls in your hand? A man's undivided attention!

Some of us learn from the mistakes of others; the rest of us have to be the others

What do men and mascara have in common? They both run at the first sign of emotion