Funny One Liners

Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy? It was Valenswine's Day.

How do you fix a woman's watch? Why should you? There's a clock on the oven.

Why did God create black men? So fat white girls could dance (and get laid).

Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?

I can feel my personality turning a dull shade of grey when I talk to you.

Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

Another World's Oldest Man has died. This is beginning to look suspicious.