Funny One Liners

Why can't single women fart? They don't get an asshole till they get married.

Everything happens for a reason; unfortunately, sometimes the reason is you.

Stupidity comes in all shapes and sizes. Some of them even look like people.

Hi, I'm bisexual. I'd like to BUY you a drink...and then get sexual.

Girls are like roads, more the curves, more the dangerous they are.

Today I made my bones by shooting my first Turkey. Scared the shit out of everyone in the frozen food section.

Wow, this article looks awesome. *clicks link* *finds out it's a slideshow* *throws computer out the window*