Funny One Liners

Why does it take 100 million sperms to fertilize one egg? Because they won't stop to ask directions

Best friends: Ready to die for each other, but will fight to the death over the last slice of pizza

Why are birthday's good for you? Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest!

If a guy remembers the color of your eyes after the first date, chances are... you have small boobs

Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student? Because education pays off in the long run!

What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground? Shoot him again

A nice box of chocolates provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?