Latest Al Bundy One Liners & Quotes

That's what being a man is like: making mistakes and not caring

Remember our motto: We ain't got it

I never wanted to get married, I got married.Never wanted kids, I have 2 of them. Why the hell am I here?

Hey, Marcy, what's holding the towel up?

Don't put on a dress and ask us if it makes you look fat. We hate that. Besides, it's not the dress that makes you look fat, it's the fat that makes you look fat

If God had wanted women to bowl, he would've put their breasts on their backs so we would have something to watch while waiting our turn

Bed them, don't wed them. Do them, don't woo them, date them don't mate them