Latest Al Bundy One Liners & Quotes

Behind every successful man is a woman who didn't marry me

I haven't showered in a week so I think I better get right to bed

Why go out for milk when you've got a cow at home

Christmas is not the time for regrets. That's what anniversaries are for

I hate my life. Can't eat, can't sleep, can't bury my wife in the backyard

People who work putting shoes on fat women who wear dresses should not have 20/20 vision

you can stab me with knives, you can beat me with clubs, you can make me open my eyes when we're having sex but there's no way on earth you can make me get a second job