All One Liners and Comebacks

One Liners

Olympic track makes you feel like you witnessed a crime, because you hear a gunshot and then see a bunch of black guys hauling ass.

This One-liner joke is rated: 0 from: 0 votes

One Liners

I was at a restaurant and I noticed my waitress had a black eye. So I ordered very slowly because obviously she doesn't listen.

This One-liner joke is rated: 0 from: 0 votes

One Liners

Tequila is a good drink: you drink it and you feel like a cactus; the only problem is that in the morning the thorns grow inward.

This One-liner joke is rated: 0 from: 0 votes

One Liners

Why do they say that eating yogurt and oysters will improve your sex life? Because if you'll eat that stuff, you'll eat anything.

This One-liner joke is rated: 2 from: 1 votes

One Liners

The last chapter of every book should just be all the characters acting completely terrified because their world is about to end.

This One-liner joke is rated: 3 from: 2 votes

One Liners

Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer... I saw the video... we need to talk.

This One-liner joke is rated: 3 from: 2 votes

One Liners

You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.

This One-liner joke is rated: 3 from: 1 votes