All One Liners and Comebacks

One Liners

If you got tired of living, don't share your thoughts with all your friends - they might not give you a chance to change your mind.

This One-liner joke is rated: 2.06 from: 17 votes

One Liners

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning.

This One-liner joke is rated: 0 from: 0 votes

One Liners

Boy : I have a pen you have a phone number. Think of the possibilities. Girl : I have a sandal you have a face. Think of Casualties.

This One-liner joke is rated: 0 from: 0 votes

One Liners

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

This One-liner joke is rated: 2.5 from: 2 votes

One Liners

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

This One-liner joke is rated: 3.11 from: 19 votes

One Liners

I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.

This One-liner joke is rated: 1 from: 1 votes

One Liners

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

This One-liner joke is rated: 3 from: 1 votes