A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized
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Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards
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Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts
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A successful man is one who makes more money that his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man
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Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle
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If you don't drink, smoke or do drugs you may live long enough to be a real burden to loved ones. Please pass the wine
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My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!
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