All One Liners and Comebacks

One Liners

What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?

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One Liners

Did you know that Santa's not allowed to go down chimneys this year? It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.

This One-liner joke is rated: 1 from: 1 votes

One Liners

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

This One-liner joke is rated: 2 from: 1 votes

One Liners

Whats the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One has a mustache and smells of fish and the other is a walrus.

This One-liner joke is rated: 3 from: 1 votes

One Liners

When you go into court, you are putting your fate into the hands of people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

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One Liners

What do marriages and tornadoes have in common? They both begin with a lot of sucking and blowing, and in the end you lose your house

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One Liners

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? They're trying not to attract any more undue blame then they already have.

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