All One Liners and Comebacks

One Liners

The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why? "Cause you're fatter than they are."

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One Liners

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time

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One Liners

I'm trying to finish writing a script for a porno movie, but there are just too many holes in the plot

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One Liners

I saw a guy on his motorcycle and the back of his shirt said "If you can read this the bitch fell off."

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One Liners

How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus? At the circus, the clowns don't talk

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One Liners

It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too

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One Liners

Foreign Aid: The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries

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